Slow Leadership: Be Careful What You Teach

You Might Be Passing On Harmful, Long-term Lessons

Anyone in a position of influence or authority continually gives lessons to those around and below them in the hierarchy—whether they plan to or not. Success, deserved or undeserved, confers credibility. People imitate their bosses—and just about anyone else who seems to have made it. Besides, pleasing the boss is probably the most basic way that people strive to get on in the workplace.

You may want others to do what you tell them, but not always what you do. Life doesn’t work that way. Some people will carefully sift your good habits from the bad ones before deciding what to copy. Many won’t, or will misinterpret what actually brought you your success. What you do will always have a greater impact than what you say.

. . . loud, aggressive, and egotistical leaders often get more credit for being “effective” than they deserve. Their behavior catches peoples’ attention. The quiet leaders who truly made it all happen are quite likely to be overlooked.

Human beings are primarily visual animals: we trust what we see much more than what we hear, or what others tell us. We also link vivid images with outcomes much more readily than subtle ones. If subordinates see you indulging a spectacular outburst of temper just before things start to happen, they will likely assume that the tantrum was what set things in motion—and ignore days or weeks of careful preparation that were almost derailed by a momentary loss of temper. If they see you working extremely long hours, they may see that as the path to success—even if all you were doing was catching up on routine you didn’t have time for earlier, maybe because of bad planning or attending pointless meetings. That’s why loud, aggressive, and egotistical leaders often get more credit for being “effective” than they deserve. Their behavior catches peoples’ attention. The quiet leaders who truly made it all happen are quite likely to be overlooked.

What lessons are today’s Hamburger Managers passing on to their subordinates? We know that those who are bullied and abused are more likely to become bullies and abusers themselves. That holds good both inside and outside of work. If toughness and harsh treatment of others seems to be what works, a surprising number of otherwise entirely pleasant people will imitate the tough-guy behavior.

Many years ago, I had the opportunity to study a group of managers who worked for an extremely aggressive, harshly dominant chief executive. Over a period of some five years, I was able to follow every new appointment to this executive team, internal or external. Who did well? Who left or was fired? Were there any common factors?

For those above a certain threshold of “natural” assertiveness, success was practically assured. Everyone below the same level would fail. Nothing to do with intelligence, skill, experience, or contribution to the business. You either fell in line with the jerk at the top (and became steadily more like him), or you left within 12 months or so.

The results of this study turned out to be surprisingly clear. Among this group of appointees, those who were themselves aggressive and demanding tended to remain and prosper. Yet—and this was far more interesting—they became steadily more aggressive and egotistical, the longer they stayed in the chief executive's orbit. Less assertive people all left or were fired, typically within a year. It was possible to predict this outcome with a high level of accuracy. All you needed was a measure of the person’s assertiveness at the time of joining the top team. For those above a certain threshold of “natural” assertiveness, success was practically assured. Everyone below the same level would fail. Nothing to do with intelligence, skill, experience, or contribution to the business. You either fell in line with the jerk at the top (and became steadily more like him), or you left within 12 months or so.

Hamburger Management is short-term, aggressive, uncaring, manipulative, venal, and often unethical. With a group of Hamburger Managers in charge, you will only get more of the same.Those who oppose, or try to avoid, such an uncivilized style of leadership will either leave or get fired. The ones who remain will steadily become more and more like the most prominent (and usually extreme) of the current leaders. Dishonesty breeds more dishonesty. Callous bullying creates a cadre of bullies waiting in the wings to take over. Leaders who habitually take life at breakneck speed create a culture of obsessive haste.

When I was a teenager, a teacher once told me always to take a long, hard look at the mother of any girl I was ever tempted to marry. “That's what the girl will be like in fifteen years or so,” he said. He was a cynical person and his advice tended to be pessimistic. Still, he was probably more right than wrong (though my first wife’s mother was sweet—and her daughter turned out to be more like her father, who was a miserable old cuss). Bad bosses train future leaders to be as bad as they are—if not in absolutely every case, at least more often than not.

Be very careful about how you behave, if you hold a leadership position. That is how you are teaching others to behave around you. Most likely, they’ll copy whatever behavior of yours is most striking. If you are responsible for choosing leaders, look at them very hard. Don’t focus just on how successful they have been in the short term in financial or similar terms. Leadership positions should never be used as rewards for past success. If a person's typical behavior is unpleasant, discriminatory, aggressive, or callous (or all of these), that is what they will “train” their subordinates to imitate. Whatever kind of person the leader turns out to be, you will likely get many more of the same in the future.

Luck plays an enormous role in business—though very few people are ready to accept openly that they simply happened to be in the right place at the right time, and their “achievement” had almost nothing to do with them directly.

As subordinates, we can break this cycle by thinking carefully about the boss’s actions before imitating them. If you suffered under a jerk, why pass that suffering on to others? Stop. Use that bad behavior as an object lesson in what not to do when your time comes. And if things are too bad, get out fast. Don’t risk becoming contaminated. Just because some behavior is obvious, or seems to coincide with some example of success, it’s never wise to assume cause and effect. Luck plays an enormous role in business—though very few people are ready to accept openly that they simply happened to be in the right place at the right time, and their “achievement” had almost nothing to do with them directly.

If bad behavior breeds more of the same, the same holds true for good examples. Nearly every revered leader learned from someone earlier who showed them the power of doing the right thing, regardless of what others around them thought. The best predictor of good leadership is having worked under good leaders. If you choose your actions well, you can produce a generation of leaders who match up to, or exceed, your highest expectations.

Jerks produce jerks. True leaders produce true leaders. How do you wish to be remembered?